French idioms: Top 20 funniest expressions
Oh, French idioms. They can be such a bummer at times. Just when you think you already got the hang of a foreign language, idioms rear their crazy little heads and go: nah-uh! Not so fast!
Imagine overhearing a French conversation that translates into something along the lines of: to arrive like a hair in the soup or to have an ass full of noodles. Just how on earth are you going to make sense of that? But yes, that’s French idioms for you!
Idioms can totally put a damper on any language learning, but they’re also fun to learn and can give you a quick peek at the culture and humour behind the language.
The French particularly have its own set of funny idioms that range in level of absurdity from mildly chuckle-worthy to off-the-charts weird. Chalk it up to the French people’s humour and clever play of words and brace yourself to learn them for future use, or simply for entertainment purposes.
In this article, you’ll find 20 fun French idioms that range from the quirky to the downright ludicrous.
- « Tiré par les cheveux »
When translated, this means “pulled by the hair”, but what it really means is that something is “far-fetched”. Kinda far-fetched, don’t you think? Not when you imagine someone pulling ideas out of their hair. Pretty certain that won’t turn out to be good ideas, too.
- « Avoir une araignée au plafond »
This idiom literally translates to “having a spider on the ceiling”. But its meaning is far more difficult to guess. Would you believe that this is actually similar to the American expression, ‘you have a screw loose’ or you’re kind of not right in the head? What the spider’s got to do with it, no one really knows for sure.
- « Il en a bavé des ronds de chapeau »
When some French-speaking dude tells you a story about how he “dribbled hat circles”, don’t take it literally. What he meant is that his eyes nearly popped out of his head in shock or because he’s having a real bad time. Poor guy.
- « Être comme une poule qui a trouvé un couteau »
While the literal translation of this idiom is to be “like a chicken who has found a knife”, what it really means is to be at a complete loss. Because, of course, a chicken wouldn’t know what to do with a knife, right? Unless it’s a mutant psycho chicken?
- « Se regarder en chiens de faïence. »
This idiom literally says “to look at each other like earthenware dogs” but basically means, to look at each other coldly, with distrust.”
Now that I think about it, these two china dogs probably really do hate each other’s guts. I mean, look at that smirk and that cold “I’m not talking to you” glare. Mean, petty dogs. Tsk. Bad doggy.
- « Fumer comme un sapeur »
Now this expression is straightforward enough and quite similar to “smoke like a chimney”. It can be literally translated as « to smoke like a fireman« , but just means that someone smokes too damn much.
- « Haut comme trois pommes »
A small person can be described by the French as haut comme trois pommes which translates to being as tall as three apples.
- « Les bras m’en tombent »
When the French are trying to tell you that they are stunned, the words can be directly translated as « my arms are falling« . No need to panic and call an ambulance when this happens, okay? It’s just an idiom laced with good old melodrama.
- « Ne pas avoir inventé la poudre »
It’s a bit of an insult, this one. Someone who’s a little dumb can be referred to by the French as one “who have not invented gunpowder« .
- « Poule mouillée »
It means “wet chicken” literally, but the real meaning is “coward”. What is it with chickens and cowards, anyway??
That was just for starters. Ready to take it to the next level?
- « Avoir des casseroles au cul »
We start off the second part of the list with this expression which literally means “to have saucepans hung on the ass”. It means to be haunted by a scandal which, come to think of it, sort of makes sense considering that a scandal could be likened to noisily clattering down the hall and banging saucepans as you walk. A terribly awful situation indeed.
- « Avoir le cul bordé de nouilles »
When the French tell you that you’ve got an ass full of noodles, don’t take it as an offense. It only means that you are one lucky dude. Just don’t ask me what the noodles have got to do with it.
- « Ça ne casse pas trois pattes à un canard »
While the direct translation, “it doesn’t break three legs to a duck” has a bit of weird flavor to it, rest assured that this idiom means no harm to any duck. Considering that a duck only has two legs, among other things, this is actually similar to the English expression “it has nothing to write home about”. Meaning, there’s nothing spectacular about a particular thing.
- « Il n’y a pas de quoi fouetter un chat »
The literal meaning says, “it’s no reason for whipping a cat« , and again, no need to worry as no cats are harmed in the making of this idiom. What it means is that it is nothing to make a fuss about. Really.
- « La vache! »
A bit like the American expression of surprise or amazement, “holy cow!” except this cow’s not holy. Literally, it means « the cow!”
- « Ne pas y aller avec le dos de la cuillère »
Literally, it says: « Not to go there with the back of the spoon”. If you’re trying to figure out what this means, stop. It’s a bit difficult to guess, but what it means is that there is no half-measures with a certain person. Like, he/she is an all or nothing type.
- « Noyer le poisson »
Yet another animal-related idiom, but this means to evade an issue. But the literal meaning? « To drown the fish« . How to do that? Beats me.
- « Parler à tort et à travers »
It means to babble or to yammer but the direct translation states “to speak wrongly and crosswise« . Yeah. Crosswise talking. Whatever that is.
- « Prendre entre quatre yeux »
The exact meaning is « to take someone between four eyes » but the logical meaning is to have an argument with someone.
- « Manger / sucer les pissenlits par la racine »
This idiom is actually dark and poetic. It literally means “to eat / suck the dandelions by the root”, but the real meaning is to be dead. Kind of paints a morbid yet poignant picture, doesn’t it?
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Thank you for reading.
